Up at 6.30 feeling sick in the gut, made my own breakfast but had trouble eating it.

Kathy came and showered me.

Sandy said Michelle, Alan, Landon & Skyler caught the train up or down one or the other to see Mum.

Woke at 4.30 to pee without issue and managed 2 more hours of sleep before getting up.

Tim is back at work today

Been a cool day.

I am still coughing to I sound like I am going to throw up but of course I don’t.

So not allowed to see mum, who is still hanging in there.

Up at 6 again, did wake at 3.30 to pee and managed to go back to sleep without problem.

A much colder morning, I am in long pants.

At 9.45 Sandra rang to let me know Mum passed away.

April is a bitch of a month.

Slept straight through the night and woke at 6am. Tasha told me that last night Tim rang Sandra about Mum’s house and he felt like he was being spoken down too and felt disrespected. This pissed off Natasha so much she wrote and I sent a text to Sandy saying how we feel.

Had the meeting at the funeral home Mum will be buried on the 21^st at Belmont.

Sandra made no comment about the text when I saw her.

Had a sleep in waking at 7am after sleeping through the night. It is suppose to be warm but not as yet.

Sandra picked me up at 9 something, and took me to Mum’s place to find clothes for her to be buried in.

All went good till Tasha arrived to get me and Dave had a go at her about posting Mum’s death on Facebook and not removing it till his daughter was told.

Tasha has as thing about step parents & children, often saying that they are not related and mean nothing to each other. Which is so wrong in my opinion.

Tasha is super pissed with me as I didn’t interfere because I love them both and didn’t want to be involved.

A new day, this morning I had to see the neurologist, he said my MRI was normal and he will refer me to a movement disorder doc in Sydney. Felt like it was a pointless appointment.

Daemon told me I am one of the best aunties that made me feel good.

Today has felt like a short day again been like that all week.

Woke at 6.30 after another good night.

We all went to Mum’s to meet the celebrant and talk about her service. I felt more included this time.

Sandy came over to get paperwork I printed concerning the headstone. She filled it in and I scanned it and emailed it to Sandy who sent it on to the council.

I forgot to do the shopping, will sort it out tomorrow.

Woke at 6.30 again a cold morning with some rain.

Kathy turned up is a mood so no shower this morning, she said she would be back this arvo

Kathy arrive around 2pm and gave me a shower, along with Tasha she changed my sheets.

A cold day

AT 9.40 YESTERDAY MORNING MY WONDERFUL MUM PASSED AWAY SO NO POST TODAY 

Good morning everyone I am still coughing like I am trying to cough up a lung or something. This means I am unable to visit my Mum in hospital, yes she is hanging in there, just, we are going day to day.

Anyway here is this weeks five facts that should be correct but if not I am blaming my reference book.

The linen bandages that were used by the Egyptian’s to wrap mummies were on average 1,000 yards in length.

Albert Einstein’s last words will never be know, as he spoke them in German and his nurse didn’t speak German.

Jamaica has more churches per square mile than any other country

According to the ceremonial customs of Orthodox Judaism, it is officially night when you cannot tell the difference between a black thread and a red one.

The post has been a target for thieves from the day the postal service started. Important mail had a picture of gallows printed on t to warn thieves who couldn’t read what could happen if the post was stolen. Stealing Her Majesty’s mail carried the death sentence.

Well got up at what I thought was 7.30am but around 9am I realised that daylight savings had ended. This means it was 6.30 when I got up.

Felt like I did a bit today after days feeling like I did nothing, 2 load of washing, did the dishes and also the weekly medications. May not sound like much but for me it was.

Woke at 6.04 laid there for a few then got up,went to pee and ring Tasha.

I sorted out Easter gifts for the girls and Leo, gave Blain money yesterday.

Summer loved the bunny ear rings I gave her.

Tim getting the after hours doctor out as he is sick with the flu, yes he is at work but will get the doc out when he gets home.

I managed to sleep in till 6.30, I got up peed in a bottle, no a ice cream container in the toilet yes. If I tried to pee in a sample bottle it would be shaken all over the bathroom…..lol

After that Tasha helped me dress and took me to have blood taken. I had a fasting test.

Tim off work for the rest of the week.

Around 11ish Sandra rang to say that the doctor told her to contact her siblings to say our goodbyes. Jess drove me down to the hospital, Tim is too sick to go.

Tasha went to see her Nan as did Kathy. At one point there was 10 visitors 7 more then we were told she could have.

After I got home Sandy rang to let me know Mum had deteriorated rapidly,thankfully her conditioned stabilised,for a bit.

However she rang again at 5pm to let me know Mum isn’t expected to survive the night.

Woke at 6.30, no phone call about Mum, I guess that’s good.

Around 9.40 Tasha drove me too see Mum, Sandra was in the carpark making phone calls, she said the doctor had just told them that Mum has days at best. However, she looked and sounded good.

Mum said that she will see,she isn’t ready to die.

Tim went and saw our GP who prescribed antibiotics.

Woke up coughing, something shocking. No way I can go see Mum.

Rang Sandy she said Mum has been moved to a single room and that Dave, Leigh and her spent last night with Mum,there was a few close calls last night. They think she will pass today some time.

Tasha came and showered me ready to go out tomorrow.

No more news about Mum.

]

Woke at 5.30 so got up and had a wash and breakfast. At 8am I got ready to go shopping,Jess forgot but when Tim rang her she got up and we left.

It was bloody great going shopping, don’t need to go every week but once a month would be nice.

No change in Mum’s condition.

I bought Tim a new thermal undershirt and of course he doesn’t want it, so going to get Tasha to return it.

Charming Spring

© Patricia L. Cisco More By Patricia L. Cisco

Published: March 2018

Reminiscent melodies
serenade the morning breeze.

Feathered creatures nest with care
in cherry blossoms pink and fair.

Perfumed scent of roses flow.
Tiny blades of green grass grow.

Misty showers soak the earth,
glorious colors come to birth.

Gathering clouds come and go,
rain, sun, and vibrant bow.

Dainty petals, fancy flair,
dancing in the warm, sweet air.

Violets, yellows, purest white,
graceful, gentle, welcomed sight.

Thank you, oh sweet lovely Spring,
patiently waiting the charms you bring!

Source: https://www.familyfriendpoems.com/poem/charming-spring

I am not with it today,tired again I have been up since 6.30 and Tasha was here just after.

Tasha came down while I was doing the medication for the week and took charge as she could tel I was having trouble.

Tasha also helped me hang the laundry up to dry.

Tasha gave me a shower before bed as I had an accident.

What a morning woke with the alarm but waited till 6.30 to send Tasha a text. However, I had to ring her at 7am as she hadn’t turned up. At which time I had already had a melt down in the bathroom while having my wash.

Turned out she had been sick at both ends all night, and was still not good.

When I rang Mum she didn’t sound like she was with it. I was talking to Mum when Jess rang my mobile she had workmen arriving and needed me to be at her place. I explained this to Mum who got shitty because I said I had to go and would ring her back.

When I rang back Sandy was there, well it turned out that Mum had taken too many Phenergan and was unable to stay awake. Phenergan is the only medication she is allowed to have at home not in a Webster pack. However, I said I think it is time to change that.

I woke up at 4.40am and felt restless so I got up and went to the loo. I couldn’t see so I removed my Cpap mask and of course I couldn’t get it back on so I have been up since then.

I had a doctors appointment Tasha said it was at 10am but she had the time wrong and were an hour early.

Tim somehow managed to go to work an hour early.

Also at work he noticed rear end damage to the car and he has no idea how and when.

Spoke to Mum after some problem with the phone, I rang, she answered and couldn’t hear me, this happened three times before I rang her from my mobile. Mum was distressed and didn’t understand why when she answered no one spoke, I had to tell her a few times what had happened.

I am feeling better today more with it.

Had some rain after I took Leo up the top of the driveway.

Been ok not great but I am never great now days.

Didn’t talk to Mum she didn’t answer the phone. The first time I rang it went to voicemail, this happens when the phone isn’t near her. So I gave it 5 mins and tried again,but it went straight to voicemail, like the phone was off the hook.

I rang Sandy who sent Dawson a text to check.

Woke up at 5.45am after s restless nights sleep only to be told by Tasha when she got here that Mum is in hospital.

Spoke to Sandy about Mum she is in Belmont hospital but maybe transferred to JHH later if she deteriorates. Her kidneys are only functioning at 9% which is low. She was also dehydrated and her heart rate was low around 45 beats per minute.

Sandy came over and had me be Mum so she could get the company she had to talk to her.They said they need Mum’s ok to do so.

Didn’t ring Mum and it felt odd.

Had a better night last night, no school for a couple of weeks but I was still up at 6am before my alarm.

Tasha drove me over to see Dad, when he heard I was going Leo asked if he could come, which of course he did.

Around 2pm the arthritis in my left knee flared up, the pain is nearly unbearable.

Jess put me to bed but I had a panic attack it was the start of a bad night.

The pain was so bad I was crying with pain,Tim is so worried he rang the Dr to your door. The doctor arrived at 10.30 wrote a script for Endone. He also told me to apply ice, which I do.

Got to bed around 11pm with a bag of ice on my leg and around 30 minutes later I fell asleep.

I woke at 9am and found Kathy and Summer were here, so she gave me a shower. I am not in much pain this morning.

Tim prepared my breakfast

Midday and I am tired so I am going for a nap.

Woke at 2pm and Tim told me to get some shoes on we were going to see Mum.

Mum was great much better then I expected her to be. She was pleased to see us.

Life Doesn’t Frighten Me

By Maya Angelou More Maya Angelou

Shadows on the wall
Noises down the hall
Life doesn’t frighten me at all

Bad dogs barking loud
Big ghosts in a cloud
Life doesn’t frighten me at all

Mean old Mother Goose
Lions on the loose
They don’t frighten me at all

Dragons breathing flame
On my counterpane
That doesn’t frighten me at all.

I go boo
Make them shoo
I make fun
Way they run
I won’t cry
So they fly
I just smile
They go wild

Life doesn’t frighten me at all.

Tough guys fight
All alone at night
Life doesn’t frighten me at all.

Panthers in the park
Strangers in the dark
No, they don’t frighten me at all.

That new classroom where
Boys all pull my hair
(Kissy little girls
With their hair in curls)
They don’t frighten me at all.

Don’t show me frogs and snakes
And listen for my scream,
If I’m afraid at all
It’s only in my dreams.

I’ve got a magic charm
That I keep up my sleeve
I can walk the ocean floor
And never have to breathe.

Life doesn’t frighten me at all
Not at all
Not at all.

Life doesn’t frighten me at all.

Source: https://www.familyfriendpoems.com/poem/life-doesnt-frighten-me-by-maya-angelou

Another week is here with more useless facts you mayor may not know.

The ”talkies” films with sound didn’t appear till 1927, although the silent films were not that silent.

When you saw a film there was a presenter called the ” the master of ceremonies” who would read out any words and fill in details of the plot.

Specially employed actors would hide behind the screen and speak the actors’ lines

Machines, like the ”noiseograph” and ”dramagraph” would add sound effects to the action.

Easter is the first Sunday after the first full moon after 21^st March

Slept in till 7am, made my own breaky.

Kathy came and shower me and shaved me as well.

Jess working, Kelli and kids came down so Daemon could see Blain & Leo.

A hot day, turned the A/C on around lunch time.

Mum sounded ok not great but ok, she was more with it at the start of our chat but after 30 mins not so much.

Had a sleep in, getting up at 7am and rang Tasha to let her know.

A coldish and wet day have to close the door to keep the rain out.

Saw Freya when Blain brought her over for a packet of chips.

Still have chest pain also under my left arm.

Awake at 5.33, needing to pee so I got straight up and at 5.51 I sent Tasha a text letting her know I was awake.

A cold start to the day, had to wear a light jacket when I went with Leo.

The pain is now under my right arm.

Mum was good, sounded happy, memory was ok.

Leo’s early day so rang mum at 1.30pm an hour early.

Woke with the alarm a fine and dry day thankfully.

I had to see the podiatrist and had my toenails cut. Tasha drove me.

Had some rain during the day but I was able to get Leo this afternoon.

Transferred some money to Sandy to help pay to have mum’s house fumigated.

Woke at 5.30 needing to pee and so I stayed up. I sent Tasha a text at 6am.

Leo off school, as he didn’t go to the swimming carnival.

Been a cool dry day with the feel of rain in the air.

Mum rang and sounded happy, not altogether with it but happy.

I woke at 5.30am, got up and sent Tasha a text at 5.45am.

Raining since I got up, Leo didn’t answer his phone and I had to get Tasha to tell him to come and get his stuff and head up to meet his driver.

Was late speaking to mum she was a tad confused towards the end but other wise ok.

Awake at 5.33 again, got up and peed, opened the house before I sent letting her know I was up.

I was feeling so tired, that at 8am I went back to bed for 1hr 15 muns.

Raining most of the day.

Blain going to his dad’s.

Had a lay down after Leo got home.

At6pm I decided to have a bath before going to have my MRI as I felt like I smelt but Jess arrived and got Tasha to shower me.

Stopped raining around 2pm so I was able to meet Leo and go to my appointment without getting wet.

Tim driving me to appointment.

Woke with the alarm, still raining, so couldn’t go with Leo due to the rain.

Spoke to Mum she mostly ok, Sandy rang her mobile as Mum wasn’t answering the house phone, she had been trying for 30 minutes,i said Mum and I had been chatting for 35 minutes.

After Mum & Sandy hung up Mum & I chatted for a further 10 minutes before hanging up.

While chatting to Mum the birds Tim have been feeding turned up, so I got some bread and feed them.

Woke at 6am straight out of bed and sent a text to Tasha. Still raining all day.

I don’t feel with it this afternoon. I am very tired.

Tasha came down at 2pm to give me a shower.

Tried to talk to Mum about her Chrisco order but she wasn’t with it enough to get what I was saying.

A new day awake and up at 5.50am, Tasha here by 6am. Tim up at 6.20 he started at 7.50am.

No rain so I was able to take Leo up the front.

Mum was so so, she remembered ringing Chrisco and canceling

something but not as much as I would like.

I checked and her payments dropped for $220 a fortnight to $91 a fortnight but she is convinced she is paying $51 a fortnight.

Been a nice sunny day

Awake at 5.45 and got up straight away, sent Tasha a text and she was here in minutes.

I am having a shocking day,shaking and feeling not with it.

I rang Mum at 1.40 so I could be done by the time Tasha arrived to shower me.

By 2.45 I was falling asleep. Tasha said it is the new medication making me so tired. She may be right.

I woke at 5.26aman got up 10 minutes later. I set stuff up and unpacked the dishwasher and was having my wash when I texted Tasha.

Been a cool but sweaty day for me, being drenched in sweat while attempting to go to the toilet.

So very tired again, I am wondering if it is the new medication and might cutout the midday tablet and see how that goes.

I woke at 6.40 and got up after restless night. I am feeling sick in the gut and had a bad start dropping stuff and shaking.

Tim was suppose to take his bike back to the place that did the work on it but they rang as he was leaving to say that he will have to push it back till Monday.

Was on the phone to Mum when Kathy arrived to shower me. I was so very tired.