JUST FACTS

Well hello, it is only 8.30am and I am exhausted, and my knees are shocking pain wise.

This week I have some genuine instructions displayed for English speaking visitors from businesses around the world.

Car rental place in Tokyo: “When passenger of foot heave in sight, tootle the horn. Trumpet him melodiously at first, but if he still obstacles your passage then tootle him with vigor”.

On a menu of a Polish hotel: “Salad a firm’s own make; limpid red beer soup with cheesy dumplings in the form of a finger; roasted duck let loose; beef rashers beaten up in the country people’s fashion”.

Japanese instructions on an air conditioner: “Cooles & Heates: If you want just condition of warm in your room, please control yourself”.

In Hong Kong dress shop: “Order your summers suit, because is big rush we will execute customers in strict rotation”.

In an East African newspaper: A new swimming pool is rapidly taking shape since the contractors have thrown in the bulk of their workers.

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